Reading, listening, watching...

As you know that I have some time to spare throughout my day here is an update and reviews of the things that have helped me fill some of it...


Currently reading or finished recently:


(Read) This I believe by Carlos Fuentes (Essays): This is a collections of essays in various different subjects. He uses the alphabet and has an entry for each letter and his thoughts about it. I really love his writing and truly wish I had read this particular book in Spanish. Carlos Fuentes is a Mexican national treasure. I can only recommend him so highly and enjoy his books. They are a very good insight to Mexican life and culture and to the culture clash between Mexico and the USA (some of them). I would recommend The crystal frontier, The years with Laura Diaz and Old Gringo.

(Read) Archangel by Robert Harris (Fiction): This is a fantastic book that restored my faith in him. Fatherland was priceless and gripping, everything that Enigma wasn't. Archangel was read recently when I was mainly reading historical novels or historical/research books. I might not sound like the kind of person that indulges in this, but it is a damn good read. The pace of it and all those things I didn't really know about Stalin (will read more about him now). The best thing was the ending. Though it was obvious, the beautiful touch of stopping right there and then. You know what is going to happen... and then the screen goes black and the credits roll, if it were a movie, of course.

(Read) The dark tower (VI) by Stephen King (Fantasy): I have read all the previous one and I think I enjoyed as far as number V. The new one makes, in my own opinion, too many references to Tolkien. He mentions a few times about this being an epic so much so that I was put off by the pushyness of it all. I will read the last book of it, just like I watched the second Star Wars trilogy. Hoping that it can redeem itself and go back to the good thing that it was and it could be.

(Read) Broken Angels by Richard Morgan (Sci-fi): This is the second of a now trilogy (Altered carbon, Broken Angels and Woken furies). The first book is fantastic and it made me think, whilst reading it, that this could have been the new Bladerunner. The second book is brilliant but it is a slower read to begin with. Too much back history trying to explain things that are not relevant to the story, though they might build a better picture of that time and events, possibly for a long series. It is a good book and it is fast paced when it takes off the ground. Some brilliant concepts and spot on descriptions.

(Reading) Dead air by Iain Banks (Fiction): I have only just started this but it is shaping up. It reads OK but like most Iain Banks' fans I think that it is now trying to be controversial to keep up with himself rather than the story just developing in such way. The Wasp factory was as fantastic as it was twisted and gripping. That story was trying to break through throughout the whole book. Sadly most of his other books that I've read (of the fiction, not the Sci-fi ones) it feels that he is pushing a square peg of controversy in to the round hole of a lame story. To my opinion his best book by a mile is The Crow road which I would highly recommend every time.

Currently listening:

Many things, mainly podcasts and old albums.

Podcasts:

Ricky Gervais of course, but I am afraid I over played them and the laughter begun to run dry. I am taking a break from them at the moment, but they are brilliant. Three more to come in between now and the end of the year.

Adam and Joe. I am surprised at how few people remember them or now of them in the UK. They are very funny and they are all quite brief.

The Pub Landlord, Al Murray. This are mainly taken from a show he is doing on Virgin radio. He is brilliant at the simplicity of his humour and I've been cracking up all week listening to them. They have a meat raffle and people calling in to tell them about drunken injuries or their Sunday lunch food.

Music:

Mainly albums that I have bought over the years and not play often enough. Nick Cave and the bad seeds, Pink Floyd's back catalogue, Radiohead, Muse, Lee 'Scratch' Perry's Arkology and some Beethoven.

Watching:

Neighbours the ill fated and boring Australian soap opera that pretends to have one foot on reality.

Lead Balloon with Jack Dee. A sitcom that he has written that so far has left me hoping for more. He has apparently been signed and is currently writing a second series. Hopefully they will get rid of the american bloke that makes me angry and of the token 'awkward' character that runs the cafe.

Spooks. MI5 series from the BBC that has actually disappointed me. The previous four series were good over all and with a bit of an edge. Now they seem to have jumped in to the innuendo writing and shit acting bandwagon. One of the big mistakes? The leader of the unit shags the babysitter and tells her he is a spy because she threatens to call social services because he doesn't spend enough time with his kid. For fuck's sake.

And finally... That Mitchell and Webb look. A brilliant sketch show. Here is one of the highlights for you to enjoy too...

Odds and sods...

Basically here and now I will write all the little things that I have thought about and forgot to write in when they would have made sense. Some other things that have really no place but inside my head and need to get out and so on...

To begin with, it is mainly to do with me running. As you might have read of me going on about it, I like it, am proud of it and hopefully will help me lose weight. The funny thing about it is what happens after I run. Obviously I break sweat and some times rather profusely.
The mad thing about it is no just sweating or the normal smell of sweat. The thing that is driving me crazy is the fact that my fleece ends up smelling of lighter fluid (?!?!?!). It doesn't make sense in any possible way. I could understand if it smelt of garlic or anything that I have eaten the day before... and before you go any further, NO, I have not been drinking lighter fluid.
It is weird and troubling, hasn't kept me up all night, but it still makes me think about it more than I should. The day of the 10km run I actually had to light incense and open a window in order to air the flat. It didn't help that I hung the clothes to dry in the living room, mind you...

Next it will be the fact that I am so jealous - and desperate - about the fact that I hardly get any hits onto this thing. Especially if you look at a mate's blog. Of course, his is professional and actually interesting and relevant things get written on it. My desperation is such that the other day a girl in Lagos tried to start a chat (messenger style) and instead of my usual 'fuck off' I started chatting with her. All with the dirty and selfish purpose to give her the address of the blog and get her to look at it. Ha, ha. You can see the red dot on the map, on the western coast of Africa. If you are american and don't know quite where or what is Africa, try googling it and then come back.
Shame on me for chatting on line and not being interested on what she was wearing or doing or anything else. I even asked her to send it to some of her friends (?!?!?!?) in the futile hope that I will, like Prince Phillip, will become an icon or cult hero in some remote country. I am sure that there is some un-written law for chatting on-line with strangers. I am sure that you must try and reach the 'SEX' subject in the shortest possible time. I reduced myself to the level of fat, shy and socially challenged perverts... where will this end?

About those times where you'll do anything or absolutely nothing... for the simple reason that you are avoiding doing something. Confused? Like how many times do you pretend to be occupied not to do 'the washing up' other things you can't be arsed to do. This might mainly, or only, happen to you over the weekend. Watching Final Score so you don't hoover. Pop out for a cigarette not to hang the laundry. There are plenty of examples and am sure you are thinking of many more now. For me, in my current situation, is harder to avoid something. That is a good reason as it has kept the flat within some sort of order and cleanliness level. Thanks to that, the flat won't be closed down by a health inspector.

One of the other random things that come to mind and I haven't shared with you is the amazing thing of checking random blogs. You might have come across this one by accident or because you are fed up of me asking you to look at it.
Some of the blogs I have seen when hitting the 'next blog' button. You'd be surprised by the amount of either religious or right wing (or a mix of both) that you come across. Then you find a nice one and read a few things, never to see it again. Though one of my big rules is that if there is a photo of a child or a baby is to immediately skip to the next blog. There is something weird about it that I hate and cannot stay there.

And finally that things that haven't and might not make it here. One of them is an extensive list of all the people I want to spit on their graves. A bit controversial and I have been advised by my legal team and censors (my wife) not to publish such list. I would love it if we could all just write 20 people we would like to spit on their graves, doesn't matter if thy are still alive, don't worry.

Anyway. Hope you read this again some day and it would be cool to get your list. You never know, if I get a few lists I shall publish them all in an entry.

Up coming Birthday!!!

Stuff Guy Fawkes, he was a traitor anyway...

It is my birthday on the 4th and I would like you to join me to bid farewell to my 28th and embrace the last year of my 20s.

So if you are one of the very few people who reads this... you are welcome to drop by.

Stabbings are not welcome and being a bit optimistic I am hoping that only friendly people will turn up, ha, ha.

So the details are as follows:

Date: 04/11/06

Time: 19:00 hrs onwards (7pm)

Venue: The Project Orange (43 St. Johns Hill, Clapham, London, SW11 1TT )

Directions: From Clapham Junction Station. Come out, cross the road and turn right. Walk up for about 400yds, it is just past an offie and a fried chicken place.

Internet map: http://www.streetmap.co.uk/newmap.srf?x=527216&y=175351&z=0&ar=Y

Last week.

Well hope you are all well.

Just a quick update on last week. My mood seems to have improved as soon as I put an expiry date on my unemployed status. This decision came due to either getting annoyed at not having money to do anything or to being to embarrassed when asked what I was doing at the moment... Or may because some twat has been leaving comments on my posts with one of those scams of 'I am making $900 a week in my spare time by joining this website'. Believe me if I was so gullible and wanted to get into pyramid sales/schemes, I would join the church, it is the same, but people say that it makes you feel better.

I have had three phone interviews for which I am waiting for a response. The worst thing about phone interviews is that it is harder for you to tell when they cringe at your stupid reply. Things are OK and now I know/have decided that if nothing comes this way within the next couple of weeks I will be temping until something appropriate comes up.

You might have noticed the 10km signs on top... that might be because I have for the first time, attempted and succeeded to run 10km. And in the more than decent time of 1hr 10min. I have stuck to the running regime because I soooooo badly need to lose weight. The trick is actually working to some extent. I have begun to reduce on size but the weight is yet to start dropping. The whole process at the moment resembles that of peeling an onion. Slowly shedding layer after layer, though the crying comes at the beginning.

I first noticed the difference when I dressed up for an interview and my DD double chin seems to have reduced to an F cup. I could actually breath and put a finger in between the collar and my neck. Though there is a disadvantage to exercising... my kneecap felt as if it have been treated by the I.R.A. the next morning. I was pretty much bed ridden by Sunday. Though, fear not as I went for a short run today and nothing fell off.

Anyhow, I better go and have a sit down wallow in self pity and practice 'pain' faces for when my wife gets home.

Celebrity adoptions.

al‧tru‧ist  (al-troo-ist) -noun
a person unselfishly concerned for or devoted to the welfare of others (opposed to egoist).

Might as well jump in the band wagon and share my thoughts in the ever present saga of celebrities adopting children from impoverished countries/backgrounds.

This I see not as an overwhelming desire from the celebrities to help people, not entirely at least. Though some good intentions must be somewhere, I see it more like a fashion and a grandiose self-pat on the back. It is a show about how benevolent they are and how much they care.

Sticking to current debate let me point out a couple of things about Madonna adopting a child. It is fine and soooooooo nice of her to be so kind. Something that she has really going for her and will definitely help her case is not only is she loaded but this is soooooooo important and close to her heart that she sent the babysitter to collect the child. She was probably too busy to go or it wasn't as safe as going the last time with an entire TV crew to record her generosity. Though this might be good as the kid will probably spend more time with her once the adoption goes through. They need to familiarise.

Below are a couple of exerts from articles and their links to what I think it is important to highlight:

• Malawi law requires would-be parents to live in the country for a year while social welfare officers investigate their ability to care for the child.
  
• Foreigners are not allowed to adopt children - but these rules appear to have been waived in Madonna's case.
  
• Source GMTV

The singer said she wanted to "open up our home and help ONE child escape an extreme life of hardship, poverty and in many cases death". Source BBC News

The bullet points are very straight forward and one can always overcome such obstacles with some cash or in this case, showing enough interest and good intention. However, the BBC one is more important to me. She specifically reduces the benefit to ONE child. With all the money already spent, the cost of the babysitter (who will actually spend most of the time with the child) and all the posh clothes... IN A LIFE TIME... couldn't that help to buy HIV suppressant drugs for the community where the little boy comes from?!?!?

Maybe that is just me being cynical. Maybe that is me not understanding their altruistic nature. The funniest thing is that I don't really see the kids growing up that aware of their origins or the troubles that plague their homelands. They might grow to be spoilt brats who will not rally for the same cause of their adoption.

It seems to me now that these kids have been reduced to fashion accessories. You will have to check for next season whether if Chinese is the new Black.

So damn Mia Farrow for so long ago starting this fashion. And remember the ending in the Farrow/Allen foreign baby adoption story...

Personal update.

Greetings.

After a couple of rants that have got me nowhere or make me feel better, I though I might do a proper journal entry.

The past week or two have been pretty much the same. That is the reason why I was forced into ranting and not sharing the exciting events in my life.

On the highlights of the last two weeks have been my wedding anniversary. For which I was so skint that all I could buy my wife was a book that I knew she wanted and then I baked some scones. That was as far as my budget could stretch. The scones turned out nicely, though I made them too thin and a bit big, so they were more like scone biscuits. They did taste like scones though.

I think in the last couple of weeks I have experience some sort of growth, mainly focused in the culinary areas. After the scones I have now ventured into soup making. This is a cheap way to make lunch for a week (4 days generally, being honest). The first week I was cautious and only made a humble bacon and lentil soup. I added my personal touch by adding a bit of garlic and a chili. This week I have made a Jerusalem artichoke curried soup (actually cauliflower as there was no artichoke).

On the job front it has been as frustrating as the recent past. So much so that I have now set myself a deadline and if I haven't got a job that I want by then, then I will take almost anything that can take me to the new year. This is simply facing reality but something that still seems to horrify me. I fear that I will be stuck in a shop or something like that wasting away my career and watching my skills die slowly of asphyxiation by the layers of dust that has begun accumulating over them. I do not want your sympathy or your money, I want a good job.

Though on a lighter note... I have another interview tomorrow (18/10/06) and calls from agencies have picked up considerably in the last few days. Probably all the agencies are trying to make as much money now as this is their last chance for good contracts or permanent positions this side of Christmas. I am just hoping that they can help me find something soon enough, if only to wing it until the new year. I don't want a Dickensian Christmas, I don't want to be the tiny Tim that has to be put down before boxing day...

Weetabix Week.

Greetings. For all those of you that are sick of the Weetabix week adverts please join me.

For those that don't know what Weetabix is... it is basically Chipboard biscuits. It is a cereal that tastes and looks just like chipboard.

Recently they have been advertising and promoting what they call the 'Weetabix Week'. This is trying to get people to eat Weetabix every morning for a week in as many permutations you can come up with.

What really gets on my tits is the fact that they have this pretend families, yet none of them disfunctional enough to be real. With cute little speccy kids with some sort of speech impediment. Such speech impediment is never attributed to the product grating through their tongue's and throats ripping their souls and vocal chords throughout consumption.

I personally hate Weetabix, in case you couldn't tell, but I have been instructed in what is the best way to eat it. Hot milk and sugar so it goes all mushy. Yet all the adverts have it with yogurt, fruit etc. In my eyes that is like telling you to eat a rock or a turd covered in custard, that'll make it alright...

If they were to show real families, why not (just for a laugh), show one of those fucked up families that are always at the supermarket when you do your groceries shopping. Don't pretend you haven't noticed them or cringed when they come near you. Sidetracking a little bit here... you shop there at the same time. Are you as disfunctional and grotesque as they are? Ask yourself that.

They should show the freak having them with pasta sauce, in a tofu stir fry, with salt and vinegar and so on...

There is as much point to this entry as there is to the adverts. They do not say like most other cereals that you will lose weight or anything other than you'll be eating Weetabix in various different and wacky ways.

Go on, be adventurous... I dare you.

David Cameron?

From the Fulham FC Website...

This is an extract from the fitness coach of Fulham FC. This is as relevant as the rest of the entries here so fear not.
As some of you might know, or have just found out, I am a Fulham supporter. Enough about me, lets get down to the point of it.
This morning I read an interview with the fitness coach for the team. They've got this bloke from Australia that used to do fitness coaching in rugby. The reason why I am making this entry is because of a comment he made that actually puzzled me:

The players as a whole have lost weight and got stronger and more powerful. Many of them have developed muscles on parts of their bodies that they’ve never had.



Would that be the extra arm we have seen the captain concealing inside his shirt? If only our goalie could grow an awkward forearm and hand on the top of his head. Or our strikers grow not only an extra leg, but an extra musclar leg to see if they can score more goals. What the hell is he talking about?
I am aware that I write a load of shite every time and that none of it is taken seriously, I hope. But this guy is trying, or at least hoping, to be taken seriously.

Anyway, if I come up or across with anything else that has wsated my time, I will report it here.

Advertising and television.

As a lot of you have hinted or thought about... I am reaching the point where I watch a bit of telly throughout the day. I avoid watching daytime television, trying to keep it down to lunch time only. OK, maybe an extended lunch, but believe me my options are limited.

One thing that has been making me incredibly angry recently is advertising. I mean, the people who come up with advertising ideas, not only do they lack a soul, but they think we are incredibly stupid. Stupid the people that paid for the 'Halifax' adverts that always rip off a track that it is at least three years old.
In the words of Bill Hicks 'They suck the devil's cock' they are 'Satan's spawn'. I personally, not only agree with it, but would like to extend it to the fact that they are the bastard children of nonces, dentists and estate agents. Not only that, but they are a bunch of smug bastards responsible for a quarter of the shit that hits our screens. I know that I am not forced to watch it, but believe me, I know it is awkward to be in a room with someone that makes you turn the volume down when the ads are on.

There is a show that I don't really know why I watch. I know that when I reveal it, you will secretly ask yourself that awkward question... why the fuck do I watch Hollyoaks. It is shocking. I have been here so long that I remember when it was believable!!! That came to an end when the script writers decided on having a bit of 'vigilante' fun and some characters tried to 'get rid' of a drug dealer. Then reality went out with a bang. The explosions begun and the 'late night specials' joined them. The late night specials were there to feed the lust of plenty a parent and pre-teen kids. There wasn't even a cheeky nipple showing to make it worth while. Then, their approach to tackling 'real' issues. People hinting about 'doing it', 'getting some action later' and many cliches avoiding to say the word SEX.

The character consistency is that of a snot. No consistency whatsoever. Mercurial characters that change from one scene to another. The stupid becomes cool, the cool becomes a bully and a loser and at moments it seems that they are all reading the wrong lines, picking the dialogue at random, only making sure to cover the necessary dialogue never minding who was actually supposed to deliver it.

In a nutshell. Hollyoaks with all it shit shallow acting, young pretty girls in skimpy outfits with an equal amount of brains as clothes, surreal situations and a plot and story so full of holes... be honest with yourself, if that is what you look for in a show or video you are fooling yourself there as you'd really rather be watching some good old school porn.

Bush's next war.

After the tragic incidents in the last fortnight, where the US saw themselves fall victims to three people with handguns walking into schools and killing innocent people; US President George W. Bush called for a press conference.

In the press conference he sent his deepest sympathies to the families of the victims. Bravely as well he promised that his government would be tough and tackle the problem. After several meetings with the Pentagon and the Homeland Security departments they have announced their strategy.

The US is to launch preemptive strikes on all the fire arms that are killing 'Innocent Americans'. This attacks will also go after all the people that are harbouring these weapons in the heart of the nation. Once securing safety in the homeland, they will go after the weapons that are killing innocent Americans abroad. This will serve as a warning to all those weapons that have killed their citizens abroad in the so called friendly fire. 'No home will be safe until we destroy those weapons and the cowards who harbour them...'

The tragic roundabout...

Still looking for a job and still getting bored and today I got a call from a job I didn't get. I would have been out of my depth and I was aware of that, but it is still not great. I don't think we ever get used to rejection, at least we shouldn't.

Changing the angle of looking at the present situation, I can only be reminded of Icarus. Running around in a maze trying to find the exit. Putting together the wings to fly out of it. Only for them to melt when I was getting close to it... all to fall back to reality and the consequences of unemployment.

'The Outsiders' best TV show ever...

I know this comes as a bold statement, but believe me I have seen the light.

This show was surprisingly on ITV1 last night (03/10/06). The show was a 'one-of' one and a half hours short. The Outsiders.
Whoever wrote this is someone reaching for all the people who are sick of Da Vinci's code, Mission Impossible and the millions of action movies out there.
The whole thing goes for one and a half hours taking the piss out of every imaginable action sequence and cliches from the spy world. Amazingly they managed to tackle 99% of the cliches within the first half hour. They manage all this by simply mocking the Da Vinci's code and then the running scene of the Bourne supremacy.

The show is so rich in comedy and satirical values that I feel it will become an instant classic. Though the director didn't show the experience or courage of Robert Rodriguez, he still had a go at completely unrealistic 'stunts' and shit special effects.

The little touches are what made it so good. The 'HEAD' of the intelligence group looks like a shaved Sir Alan Sugar. If that is not good enough for you to laugh then wait for the scene where TWO NINJAS are waiting for him in his flat. The ninjas shouldn't be taken lightly as they were sent by the Vatican. Which we all know that apart from eradicating races during the crusades and the inquisition they strengthened themselves. During the Pope's tour of Asia they imprisoned the top ninjas after a struggle in a bar involving some Swiss guard squadies... Lets not stray from the main point...

The bullet points of the satirical genius of Andy Goddard the writer and director of the show:

• Vatican ninjas
• Scenes inside a castle... showing bare red brick walls.
• The fat lawyer asks Are you going to finish that in a restaurant.
• Sir Alan Sugar managed to take control of a whole town just to get this twat to do one more job.
• The reminder that No one quits.
• After a couple of punches on the face, the hero starts hallucinating his estranged daughter.
• And that all the sets seemed to have been improvised and filmed inside a council flat.

In brief it is the funniest show I have seen in a while. The only thing that was lacking were the 'BOING' special effects, but then, that might have been pushing it. The beeb should be worried as they think about Little Miss Jocelyn and I'm with stupid compared to this show. It is so good that it can't be real. All I need is for someone to try and rubbish it by telling me it was a serious action/adventure drama.

Coming soon...

Taking on television...
Inappropriate songs that were out when I was a kid and we all used to sing to...
Simple comparisons...
Maybe, just maybe a controversial list or a discussion as to whether it should be released...

And of course many more ramblings about nothing other than ME, ME, ME... and my single-minded views.