Glastonbury Review... Pt 2

I know, I know, it is a week late and I said that it was going to be done sooner rather than later, but anyway there is no one reading it apart from myself...

Anyway, because of the delay, I thought I would keep it very simple:

The good:
The good covers so much that will have to keep it limited to the normal areas. The mood was brilliant and most people were very friendly.
Something that wasn't good but it was rather life saving was the flushing toilet block. Man, those things rock and they clean them constantly so there was no real problem there.

Bands that really did it are as follows (in my own opinion) - CSS they were the most fun you could ever have and Love Foxx is as hot as she lacks dancing skills and rhythm. But bloody hell she can work the crowd and make you laugh.
Chemical brothers were amazing, not a very long set and I have to admit that I found dancing a bit difficult with thick mud up to my ankles and having had to walk in it for three days left my legs a bit tired. Talk about visuals!!! Fucking amazing is the simplest and fairest way to describe them.
Sir Shirley Basset (Dame Shirley Bassey) you must have seen her on TV, she rocked and she said 'ass' and laughed straight after it.
The Coral, Biffy Clyro, The Cribs, The View, El Presidente, The Marley Brothers, Arctic Monkeys, The Hours, pear cider, food... You get the point, it kicked arse!!!

The Bad:
The nob jockey sound engineer who prevented us all from hearing Dizzee play live with the Arctic Monkeys.
The people that laughed at my hat.

That fucking baked potato I had on Sunday. Probably the same sound engineer who managed to fuck up the guitar for half a song for Biffy Clyro and had the lead singer looking like a twat hammering at it for no real reason what so ever.

Win Butler 's (Arcade Fire) mouth that wouldn't stop talking shite in between tracks for what it felt like ever and then complaining that he'd just been to a fucking wedding in Dublin with more atmosphere. How he'd fucking like it if some twat started talking shite in between speeches and dishes, not letting him get into the mood of it or talking for so long that the mood would start abandoning him...

Mike, simply because I hate him and I now regret my one missed appointment with fate... I could have hurt him or worse, months before he made it big. I simply didn't know at the time that the fucking irritating waiter (whom I anyway wanted to hurt) would be him.

The Ugly:
The urinals by the pyramid stage. Piss mud, what it seemed to be waist high and slippery as fuck which made you (nearly) shit yourself when you went for a wee, with your heart in your mouth, dreading a fall into the piss mud.
That cunt that started pissing in the middle of the crowd in between the Klaxons and CSS. Pretending that nothing was happening, but nevertheless he just wee'd there.

The wait for the coaches. Freezing cold rain, organising skills that people in Mexico would be ashamed of and no fucking sleep make it difficult to enjoy when after a great weekend you are desperate to go home.

Apparently shortly after our (2 hour late) coach turned up and we left, the red cross was called in as people were suffering from hypothermia.

Anyway, so that was my compressed version of events, I fucking loved, I hated the mud, but it made walking so hard that my thighs now look like Lance Amstrong's. The food was great and though I spent a fair bit of money I still think it was worth it and will definitely try to go next year.

Ta, ta.

Glastonbury review...

Soon to come... the review and some photos...
However you can already see some of the photos in MyLiveSpace in the link to the right...


As well I will launch a new blog in Spanish for all of you who care, might be interested or would just end up there by mere accident...



Love you all.

Glastonbury... here we come!!!

After, I think, about 15 years of wanting to go to Glastonbury and having to fight on-line and on the phone (simultaneously) for the previous 3 festivals and missing out on the tickets...

We've got some!!! That is soooooooo cool and finally I am getting properly excited about it... At work it has been so busy and at moments rather unpleasant, that I really didn't have any or enough time to ponder about going to Glastonbury this year.

As a good geek, I've already colour coded the artists for each day and will have to assess the feasibility once on site and taking the times it would take from one stage to the other and so on.

My excitement it has been mildly clouded by the (spine chilling) thought of the 'facilities' AKA toilets... I have you know that I am rather picky when it comes to this issue. Only when travelling I was able to use a shared toilet without the need of having to spend there more than a few months to asses the habits of each individual and calculate the risks...
To give you an idea at how bad I can be... there was one place that I worked at that it was considerably over a year before I used the toilets for anything other than a wee...


Anyway, bodily functions aside... it is amazing and though the weather has not been on our side this year, I am very much looking forward to it. Currently I am trying to cut back the amount that we take as I don't want to be a) A sherpa or b) One of those fucking yuppies who all they're missing is that picnic basket with the bubbly, strawberries and only one man servant as they're slumming it... it is a festival of course.
I am so trying to cut back on unnecessary stuff that I have decided to only take a couple (max 3) t-shirts. This might sound OK to you, if you believe that I will be there only Friday to Sunday... sadly for my wife, we could only get the coach tickets. That means that we will be there from Wednesday and come back at some point on Monday.
I really don't know how much I will stink by the time we get to meet up with mates that are also going... Frankly my dears, I don't give a damn.

So that is at the moment the way the cookie is crumbling. I bought a pair of wellies yesterday. My first pair since some point in the 80's when I was a wee little one jumping into puddles. I think my last pair was either yellow with a blue line going around the sole or they were red with yellow insides and soles.

This new pair is a manly black with brownish sole and I wore them most of yesterday. Pretty much like a small child. As soon as I got home from the shops, I threw my shoes to one side and put on my new wellies. This might sound bad, but I am rather pissed off by the fact that kids and women get cool designs of wellies and we don't. I even tried yesterday to trick the staff of the shoe shop by picking up a pair of kid's ones (with pirate skeletons brandishing swords) and asking if I could try them on on a 7... As you can see from the photos below... I failed. Correction, the shops failed me...


Anyway, needless to say, I am already getting all our shit together as we will be leaving very early on Wednesday morning to catch the coach...
I will certainly be flying the flag, but I am afraid that the mask will stay here. I will take the bottle of Calpis with me so that I can update the world tour on MySpace.

Anyway, hope you all have a great week and a great weekend and I will upload some photos and my attempts of reviews once we get back. Might even try to update this through my phone, but now... that is so wanky...

Have fun beautiful people, ugly people, do what you must or you usually do that passes for fun. Au revoir.

I name this planet 'RETARDO'

Based upon recent findings, I can nearly absolutely claim that the planet is mainly inhabited by retards...

Sorry, not fair on people with mental disabilities, but I have been facing seriously commonsensically challenged people. I cannot name names or places as it is easy to relate and tie two and two together... well, that is giving them some credit on their intelligence and reasoning skills. Sorry, YOU, will guess and they'll probably think I am talking about someone else and probably think that after all I have joined their gang and am willing to slag off that other person...

Fucking hell, you can tell I am angry. Man, talk about banging your head against a brick wall or trying to get water out of a rock... that would have saved me time, compared to the shit I've put up this last week.

I know, I sound like a fucking martyr, poor me... sorry just incredibly frustrated, can't help it there. Just imagine that the fruit of your labours is sent out to the same distribution list... the person responsible for you asks you the same fucking question as every week.

Where is such thing? To which your answer remains the same after four weeks. It is that one named such, just like it has been named for the last four weeks...You can only mutter under your breath and wait for the next question in the now - incredibly irritating - sketch-like routine... What about the historical stuff? (My answers will be now all in capitals as though I utter them at normal volume, my mind is screaming them) IT IS THE FIRST FOUR WEEKS SHOWING THERE... THERE, YES, THOSE ARE PRIOR TO... How come it peaked on the fourth week? NO, IT DIDN'T, THAT WAS THE RE-LAUNCH WEEK... and after that your calls and e-mails are ignored. This is followed by an e-mail to the team puzzling over the peak on the 4th week and static silence as a reply to your calls and more than likely you have now embarrassed your boss...

Man, I hate the fact that people can be so big fucking headed not to be arsed to read your e-mails or answer your calls... when all you're trying to do is stop them from looking like fucking idiots...

You wouldn't believe that I've already had this same rant four times in the last 4.5 hours...

Anyway, it is great to be back and hope you like the pictures...